Major League III, On pace stats, Gaborik rumors, and paying respects

In the movie Major League III: Back to the Minors, the Minnesota Twins lose a ball game to their fictional minor league affiliate — “The Buzz.” This of course brings great embarrassment to the entire Twins organization. The reason I bring this up is because something like this really happened and it happened to the Philadelphia Flyers of the NHL. To add to the laughs it was the last game ever to be played at the famous Philadelphia spectrum. The Flyers lost 4-2 to the Phantoms. Apparently the defense and goaltending supplied by the big club that night couldn’t stop the offensive juggernauts; Patrick Maroon and Jonathen Matsumoto. The Flyers are going to need to seriously step up their game. I mean… a loss to your minor league team? Oh, and I don’t think the addition of Andrew “McGilla Gorrilla” Alberts is going to help shore up that blueline either.

I also wanted to talk about the infamous “on pace stats.” I can’t be the only one who thinks these things are hilarious to look at after the first couple games of the season. Here are some of my favorites…

1) Ethan Moreau of the Edmonton Oilers is on pace for 0 goals and 164 assists after playing his first game last night against the Avs.

2) Daniel Sedin is on pace for 82 goals and 123 assists while his brother Henrik is on pace for 41 goals and 123 assists — I’m sure Canucks fans wouldn’t mind seeing either of those totals.

3) Minnesota’s Derek Boogaard is on pace for 0 goals and 0 assists…. although that one may ring earily true.

4) Sharks rookie Lukas Kaspar is on pace for 27 goals and 0 assists.

5) Ladislav Nagy is on pace to not play in the NHL this season… or for the rest of his career.

6) Kevin Bieksa is on pace to hurt his leg 41 times this season… ouch.

Now that I have had some fun I think I should try to get back on track here. Allow me to do that by talking about the Marian Gaborik trade speculation. Latest from everyones favorite blogger, Eklund, had Gaborik possibly making his way to Ottawa. As a Wild fan I am truly fed up with this whole situation (And for those who haven’t figured it out yet, I AM a Wild fan). Some reports state that the Wild offered Gaborik a 10 year deal somewhere in the range of $80 million dollars. If these reports are true… then Doug Riseburough is officially INSANE… YOU’RE INSANE DOUG! Gaborik is not worth that kind of coin and never will be. I would rather the franchise player on this team be a center first of all, a guy like Vinny Lecavier. Gaborik is a fairly soft winger with a bad injury history. He can score like the greats but he doesn’t have a lot of intangibles. If Ottawa wants him then I say trade him. I would love to get a guy like Nick Foligno or Antoine Vermette in some kind of package deal.

Finally I wanted to pay my respects today to both Luc Bourdon and Alexei Cherepanov. Both players were way too young to leave this earth. I thought the ceremony the Canucks had for Bourdon was beautiful and the game Luc’s best friend Alex Burrows had was deeply inspirational. I’m sure the Rangers will be having a similar ceremony for their 2007 first round pick. It’s just so sad to see, what would have been two great careers, cut short like that. I’m sure that there is a special rink up there in heaven for them. God bless.

Mats Sundin, The Wizard of Oz, love for Sid, and THE RETURN

Mats Sundin has been pissing off a lot of people lately. Why? Indecisiveness, of course! But before we all go pick up our pitchforks and torches let me try to put this in perspective. You come home after a long day at work and you’re starving. You open up your freezer door to see Stoufers frozen Meat Loaf and Potatoes. Then you glance to the other side and see a Hungry Man Meat Loaf and Potatoes. You think…. hhhhmmmmmm. Ten minutes go by and you’re still starving. Which one will be better? Stoufers or Hungry Man? Finally, after 20 minutes of deliberation you pick the Hungry Man (fine choice by the way). For Mats Sundin the gravity of the situation is much heavier than picking a frozen meal after work. This choice will affect the rest of his life and the rest of his families life. How would you feel if people kept telling you that “you have 10 seconds to pick out the Meat Loaf you want” and then started bitching at you when you didn’t make up your mind by then. Stop with the time lines people! Let the man take as much time as he needs to get things figured out. It’s not like hes going to come to camp out of shape for whatever team he decides on — It’s SUNDIN for crying out loud!! The mans been getting it done for years now.

I wanted to use my piece today to show some love for a couple of players as well. I would like to start with one of my all time favorites, Detroit Red Wings goaltender Chris ‘The Wizard of OZ’ Osgood. For years I have cheered this man and for years I have had to defend him against naysayers. Osgood is Hall of Fame in my book and always has been. The case is clear — 363 career regular season wins, 59 career playoff wins, once named to the NHL Second All-Star Team, twice an NHL All-Star (even though he should have been named many more times, IMO), two William M. Jennings Trophies, and yes… THREE Stanley Cups. Everybody said he was done a few years ago, said that his time was up and that he would be a backup to finish his career. He didn’t look like a backup this season, especially not in the playoffs. In this years playoffs he went 14-4 with a 1.55 GAA, a .930 SV%, and 3 shutouts… spectacular! I am really looking forward to seeing him start next season.

The other player I wanted to throw some love at is Sidney Crosby. Good god… everybody hates him! Not quite sure why either. I know he gets called a whiner but so did a lot of the other greats. This guy is a great hockey player and I appreciate his game. I am not going to be afraid to shout, “I like watching Crosby play!” He’s a ton of fun to watch. Very smooth skater, great hands, deceptive shot and man alive he has awesome vision on the ice. One of my good friends, Chris, who I grew up playing hockey with absolutely DESPISES him. I just don’t get it. Great players only come around so often, you may as well take the time to enjoy them.

Finally I wanted to touch on the return of Joe Sakic for his 20th NHL season. Way to go Joe! For the last 8 seasons you have made me miserable. Watching you go all “snipeshow” on every goaltender that has ever entered the Wild’ crease hasn’t been all that fun. Now I have to suffer through one more season of watching you pick top corners with ease…. and at all the worst moments of course. But seriously, Joe is a great player and deep down in my heart I am glad he has decided to comeback. The NHL just wouldn’t be the same without him.

*THIS JUST IN*

Stu Barnes has just announced his retirement from the National Hockey League. I was always a fan. Good luck in whatever you decide to do. I wish all the best for you and your family. You had a very solid career. Man, I am going to miss Rick Jeanneret’s goal call for him….. “goal scored by SSSSTTTUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU BAAARRNNNEESSS!!”

(www.TheScoreBoards.com)

Fedorov being sued, Ted Nolan gets fired, and more…

The funniest news to happen over the last week or so is the headline on TSN that reads, “Fedorov being Sued by Michigan Bank.” The bank claims that Fedorov owes up to $2.1 million in interest and principal. This is what happens when you go to the Darren McCarty School of Finance. The truth however is that none of this really matters. Not only did Fedorov ink a one year deal with $4 million with the Washington Capitals for the upcoming season but he has a long history of ‘cashing in’ wherever he goes. In other words, this is like a drop in the pond for Sergei.

The clown show that is the Islanders continues to be a laugher. Just recently they parted ways with head coach Ted Nolan.

Lets go over the Islanders saga to this point…

1) Remember who drafted Roberto Luongo? It was the Islanders. Not only did the Islanders trade the best goalie currently in the NHL but they also packaged him with sniper Olli Jokinen in a deal with Florida. Who did they get back? Mark Parrish and Oleg Kvasha. That move made more heads spin then Markus Naslund for Alek Stojanov. Brutal.

2) Raffi Torres and Brad Isbister for Janne Niinimaa and Evgeni Tunik. While Isbister is a total scrub Torres has proven his worth over the last few seasons. Despite being a bit inconsistent he is still a fairly young guy and is known to be one of the hardest working guys in the league. So wheres Janne Niinimaa now? Try Switzerland.

3) Trading Denis Grebeshkov for Marc-Andre Bergeron. While Bergeron was a wash on the Island Grebeshkov turned himself into a valuable piece of the Oiler puzzle. In 71 games last season with the Oilers he had 3 goals, 15 assists, and was a plus +2. Look for him to expand on those numbers.

4) Hiring Neil Smith only to fire him about 10 minutes later. What is this ‘The Apprentice?’

5) Hiring your backup goaltender to take over the General Manager duties. No disrespect to Garth Snow but the idea is just so ridiculous. This has also raised expectations for backup goalies around the league to do more. I hear Johan Hedberg, Curtis Sanford, Alex Auld, and Craig Anderson have all been beefing up their management resumes.

6) Giving Ricky ‘Dynamite’ a 15 year contract. While I like DiPietro and think he is a great goalie a 15 year deal is just WAY too much. Ricky has had some knee injuries in the past that should make Islander fans worry. Not to mention he could go all Jim Carey on us at any second. Once a goalie hits that downward spiral its a tough climb back up — just ask Patrick Lalime.

Ted Nolan took two terrible teams and made them very competitive in the east. He got them to the playoffs the year before last with some Richard Park magic and made Viktor Kozlov think it was 2002-2003 all over again. It might be a while before Nolan finds another coaching job in the NHL and that’s just sad. Nolan is as tough as nails and a great hockey mind.

I also wanted to touch on the retirement of Dallas Drake. Not a big deal right? Well it is to us DUSTERS. For those who don’t know what a duster is I will explain. A duster is someone who isn’t all that good at hockey. Good enough to make the team but not good enough for a serious role. So what does a duster do? A duster goes around hitting anything and everything that moves while trying to get under the skin of the opposing team. How do I know this? Because I am a duster. Heres to you Dallas Drake! After 16 years of mucking and grinding you got your cup. You’re an inspiration to kids playing on the 4th line of their teams everywhere!

The last thing I was going to discuss was the announcement of the outdoor game at Wrigley Field. This game is set for January 1, 2009. The game will be held between the Chicago Blackhawks and Detroit Red Wings. Man do I love those outdoor games. I can remember watching (then) Canadians goalie Jose Theodore with his winter hat on over his helmet. Watching Crosby win the one last year in a shootout was also something that will stick with me. Lets hope this one is just as good if not better than the last two. And hey, lets hope for some snow again too!

(www.TheScoreBoards.com)

Lowe Vs. Burke and other random NHL notes

Greater than Ali V. Frasier… the ongoing feud between Anaheim Ducks GM Brian Burke and Oilers GM Kevin Lowe. For those who don’t know this all started the year before last when Kevin Lowe offered young Ducks power-forward Dustin Penner, a Restricted Free Agent, an offer sheet worth $21.25 million over the course of 5 seasons. This of course came after the Oilers offered Thomas Vanek of the Buffalo Sabres (who was also a Restricted Free Agent) a $50 million contract, 7 years deep. The Sabres were able to match and keep the star winger but the Ducks were not. Penner became an Oiler.

Burke was quick to strike, calling Lowe’s maneuver both ‘gutless’ and ‘classless.’ Also stating the obvious, that both offers from Lowe were ‘grossly inflated.’ Since then the words have gotten much stronger. Burke now pins the absurd salaries and contract offers that we have seen this free agent season on Lowe. Even going so far as to say that Lowe has completely eliminated the second contract. Normally that is the deal that bridges the gap between being a good young player and a good veteran player. Lowe fired back at Burke this off season stating; “He’s a moron” and also claiming that Burke butchered the Vancouver franchise before leaving and ‘inherited’ a great team in Anaheim.

No need to fear if you are an Oiler or Ducks fan however — Gary Bettman is putting his foot down (Take a moment to get the laughs out….). Yes it’s Pee-Wee Herman to the rescue ladies and gentlemen.

”We felt for a host of reasons it was important to bring the parties together and make it clear to both organizations that public comments disparaging the other were bad for the business and would no longer be tolerated.”

Bettman couldn’t be more of an idiot. If he knew anything about business he would let these two have it out. The media loves the trash talk and I think most of the fans do as well. Let these two go to war. Give them some boxing gloves and put it on PPV if you have to. Edmonton and Anaheim is a great budding rivalry and I say we pour some fuel on this fire. Chris Pronger being a jerck-ass to the people of Edmonton isn’t enough. We need a steel cage match. On one side you have the Oilers, a storied franchise in the heart of Canada. And on the other side you have the Ducks (should have stayed Mighty), a franchise that was built in memory of an awful Disney movie… that somehow won a cup. Let this hate grow! Charlie Conway (Long time Ducks Captain) is an obnoxious punk… I would love to see Fernando Pisani take a run at this softy.

I also wanted to talk some more about the Free Agent Frenzy as it seems to be winding down.

Owen Nolan signed a two year contract worth $2.75 million a season with the Minnesota Wild. In retaliation the ‘Just For Men’ hair people immediately extended Keith Hernandez, Walt ‘Clyde’ Frasier, and Emmit Smith. I thought this was 2008… not 1998. But on the other hand he does still bring a fine physical presence to the ice. No one crashes and bangs like Nolan, even now. And who could forget that sweet move he had at the 97′ All-Star game? Messier lost the puck in his legs, Nolan got the breakaway, called his shot top corner, and drilled it. Hasek hadn’t looked so confused since Rob Ray asked him to sign a stick for charity…

Also getting signed recently was Todd Boo-tuzzi. The Calgary Flames signed him to a one year deal worth $1.95 million. Soon after the signing Steve Moore quickly demanded $1.9 million of it. Bertuzzi has never been the same player since the Moore incident. Last year with the Ducks he scored a lousy 14 goals despite getting Power Play time and playing the wing at times for Ryan Getzlaf. Canucks fans were thrilled to find out they would be seeing Bertuzzi 8 times this season, 4 of which will be played at GM Place.

And finally I would figured I would talk about the Tampa Bay Lightning. Let me start off by saying that I couldn’t be happier to see the return of THE mullet. For all the naysayers out there you need to cool it. Tortorella was a great coach but Melrose belongs behind the bench. Tortorella is bound to find himself a new team soon (Probably should have been the Leafs). For those who grew up watching Melrose run the bench in LA and followed his every word on nhl 2 night (ESPN 2 was too cool for capitol letters back then) this is a time for celebration. He’s no Don Cherry but hes all American Kids have. We don’t get Coaches Corner or Behind the Mask here in the states… we get MELROSE!

Hope you all enjoy my newest blog and stay tuned for more to come….

(www.TheScoreBoards.com)

The Draft and Free Agency Madness

A lot of action going on in the NHL recently. Let’s start with the draft…

Taken number one overall this year was Steve Stamkos. Stamkos is a young center who shot up the ranks playing for the OHL’s Sarnia Sting. In 61 games played for the Sting Stamkos posted 58 goals, 47 assists, and 88 Penalty Minutes. What was really impressive to me however was the fact that he scored 11 goals in just 9 playoff games. That’s pretty clutch.

While I don’t think he will be a bust you can never tell with these things. For every Sid ‘The Kid’ theres an Alexandre Daigle. For every ‘Super’ Mario theres a Brian Lawton. And for every Joe Thornton theres a Patrick Stefan. We would like to think that the #1 overall pick becomes a star for all to enjoy but as we all know thats just not the case.

I do like Stamkos though and you can put me on record right now; this guys going to be great.

Some intriguing trades took place during the draft. The deal that sent Olli Jokinen to Phoenix was a total head scratcher for me. The first player in this deal made sense; Keith Ballard. Although Ballard has been traded a few times in his young career he is a very good young defensemen. Big, mobile, and steady. Florida needed a good young defensemen too with the issues they are having with current #1 guy Jay Bouwmeester. The second part made less sense; Nick Boynton. For those who don’t remember, Nick Boynton is a pirate. Or at least he looked like one when he gave a throat cutting gesture a few years back to (then) Montreal Canadians forward Mike Ribiero. All that was missing from that scene was a plank and a crows nest. And as is usual in a package deal, a second round pick was also thrown in.

Rumors of a deal from Ottawa that may have included Antoine Vermette, rumor of a deal from Minnesota that may have included Pierre-Marc Bouchard, and rumor of a deal from Vancouver that may have included Kevin Bieksa made this one tough to understand. So what was Jacques Martin thinking? Who knows. Most fans feel as though he could have gotten much more than what he did. And if you’re a fan of Florida then I just feel bad for you. Jokinen was your #1 center, a 4 time 30+ goal scorer, and your captain.

Now I’m going to move on to Free Agency…

If you’re a Colorado fan then you have my deepest sympathies. Enjoy Andrew Raycroft. Tyler Arnason wasn’t enough? If the goal in Colorado is to acquire the laziest players in the league then you are about half way there with those two. For those who haven’t seen it there is a great video of Raycroft falling asleep on the bench in Toronto… pretty much sums up his career. The video of course can be found on YouTube. I guess Mariusz Czerkawski or Roman Turek weren’t available….

And what would Free Agency be without the Leafs making a stupid decision? $3.5 million dollars a year for Jeff Finger? Jeff Finger? I could only hope this Finger plugs a big hole for you Leafs fans. Back in 2003-2004 this guy was playing for the ECHL’s Reading Royals. For those who don’t know the ECHL is the equivalent of the Federal League portrayed in the movie Slapshot. He has a total of 94 NHL games at the age of 28. While he did play pretty well last year this is still a massive overpayment. Old Fletch’ better make sure Brian Burke doesn’t catch him in an alley…

The disaster that is the Canucks has been fun to watch this off season as well. $10 million dollars a season for Mats Sundin? Yes, I am aware that they have the money to spend… but that doesn’t mean you spend it all like that!! What makes this hilarious though is the fact that Sundin doesn’t want to sign anywhere for another month or two. This leaves the ‘Nucks completely handcuffed. Oh and lets not forget… Sundins good friend and former Canuck captain Markus Naslund has headed to the Rangers…

Finally I wanted to discuss the Devils. Their off season reminds me of a bad version of the show High School Reunion. I love Brian Rolston but the guy is 35. Not exactly an ideal time to be giving him $20 million over the course of 4 years. Bringing back Bobby Holik was an odd move too, seeing as how he is 37 years old and hasn’t been relevant since his last season in the blue and red. Playing the role of the sad puppy outside the Prudential Center would have to be Sergei Brylin. While all his old friends are coming back he is being sent packing. Poor Sergei. Hopefully someone will bring him in. He has always been a great two-way player. Not to mention he has 3 Stanley Cups to his name.

Well thats it for now. Hope you enjoyed and feel free to comment!

(www.TheScoreBoards.com)